JOHN.......................

John, you have always been one of those "bigger than life" people!  Before you were born, we probably had a girl's name picked out, but we didn't need it - we finally had our JOHN MILTON!   I wrote in another chapter of your birth in the guest house at the Bobo mission, with Marg Robers and a French doctor delivering you. 

As soon as we got to the village, everyone had to come and greet for our baby. Even the old men from the village came into the nursery to give their Bobo blessings! From young childhood you had an investigative, upbeat personality. You were funny, outgoing, generous, inquisitive, a leader, empathetic, loving - the list could go on. We saw these qualities developing in you even as a child, qualities you still have as a grown man.

There was one quality we needed to curb - your anger. One day you were playing a game with the village boys, with those pointed iron things - your friend won and you were mad and without stopping to think you threw the iron at him - and fortunately did not hit him, as you could have killed him. So I took you into the bedroom and had a long talk with you about holding you temper. You were just a little guy but you seemed to understand.  Another time you and Madu were arm wrestling and you being so much stronger  broke a bone in his arm!  Dad splinted it up - and Madu wore that bandage as a badge of honor until the arm healed! 

You sure gave Sini a run for his money - I can still see him running after you yelling, "Zan! Zan" as he tried to catch you. We could tell you were not emotionally ready to leave us and the village, and so we waited to send you to ICA until you were almost seven.  They did not want first graders at ICA who were not yet six by the end of September - you turned six October 1st that year - so we did not ask special permission to send you as you were not emotionally ready to leave us. That meant you and Jonathan were in school together and graduated together from ICA. 

You and Jon went to ICA together, and by then I had baby Mark in my arms to stay home and comfort me!  That was the one big hardship for me as a missionary,  being separated from you kids.  You had many friends at ICA - lots of them. But your close friends were Jon Kennedy and Rollo Royle, and you had them year round as we all lived in Bobo for some years. I was so glad when we finally got all of you graduated from ICA. We found the houseparents who had spent years on the field and then filled in at ICA were the easiest to deal with. They knew what it was like from the parents' side, as well as the ICA staff.

When you were home, you had such fun riding your motor bike and hunting small game in the busy. We were on a mission picnic one night and it was after dark before we were ready to leave. Just at that moment you started to scream - you had been bitten by a scorpion. (the only one in our family who ever had a scorpion bite and they are very painful.)  We put you in the van and rushed you to the hospital where they gave you shots to dull the pain and by the next day you were over it.

You started dating Brenda at ICA and she lived in Ghana on vacation.  You and Rollo David rode your motor bikes down to Ghana to get a car drivers license, you could get one easily there.  So that was your first license.  Another time you went to southern Burkina to visit another MK - I think maybe Rollo was with you then too - and you found a cave where there were big constrictor snakes.  I was glad I didn't know about that time until it was over.  Maybe that was the time you found a large python, probably twelve feet long and brought him home with great pride in a burlap sack on the back of your moto!  I was horrified.  Dad calmly made a place inside the old water tower out back of our Santidougou house and put the pythan (or boa) in there. Of course all your friends were excited about this.  The next morning you went out at dawn and came running in to tell us (in bed) that your snake had escaped!  All the village kids went looking for it - they said they could find it easily as it was not a "here snake"!  But search as they could it was never found. I must say I did not shed any tears about that!!

When you were in eighth grade we were on furlough and  you went to Nyack public schools, in the junior high department. They had a class play and you were the lead actor and did a fantastic job. The drama teacher was so excited about your performance and sad when she heard you were leaving to go back to Africa again. We, of course, went to see your play and you were a natural!  Hollywood lost an actor to the African bush! 

Brenda had gone with her folks on furlough and we went on furlough then too. That was right after your graduation.  You and Tim lived in the basement of our house that year in Nyack.  When we first got back to the US we went down to the New Jersey shore for a short vacation. Brenda had come up to see you and so you asked if she could go along. The older girls were so disgusted because she was always wanting to do things alone with you apart from the family.  She went home and you started classes at Nyack.  Your heart was not in your studies, you had Brenda on your mind. She came to visit again. I basically liked her but she was used to having the best of everything and you were not in any financial condition to have that kind of girlfriend or fiancé. You decided early on that fall that you were going to move to Florida to be near Brenda and get a job. Which you did. I had always tried to not make negative comments about any of the girls or guys you kids liked or dated. But I do remember telling you that she would be a hard girlfriend to support as she was used to having the best of everything.

You came up to Nyack for a couple weeks in June before we left for Africa again. It was so good to have you around and you were your normal self. You did not open up and talk too much about Brenda.  One evening there was a phone call from her and you talked for ages on the phone, but never said anything about the call to us. After we were back on the field we had a long handwritten letter from you, telling us that you and Brenda had broken it off, you had not wanted to bother us with that when we were getting ready to travel.  And we breathed a sigh of relief, she was not for you. You stayed with Grandma and Grandpa for a little bit and then went to live with Uncle Dave and Aunt Margot and their boys.  We so appreciated their taking you in.

You were back in Nyack again and working and took some classes. It was there you met Jennie, our beautiful Jennie, who later became your wife.  You and Jonathan roomed together and worked in some hotels together as well. You kind of learned food management on your own through hands on work.  You also dated another girl - before Jennie I think - and her name was Sheryl. She was with you in the car when you had a car accident. And she left Nyack and went elsewhere to school.  Jennie and you started dating and got serious and planned to get married. You were going to be married in the summer and we were going to be there.

I had been sent by the mission to help out new missionaries (Several of them) in Guinea and was gone a week or ten days.  When I got off the plane back in Ouaga, Dad met me with the news that you and Jennie were getting married in December.  It was at a time when we could not get away and that was sad for us.  You were so good about doing a film and sending that and lots of pictures so that we could see  your beautiful wedding and Puerto Rican reception!  We loved Jennie's family and bonded with them quickly, great people!

That meant you had been married several months before we met Jennie. She told me later of what a nervous wreck she was going to the airport in Ft. Myers to meet us. She changed her clothes and her hair style several times until she settled on what she wanted to wear to go and meet our plane at midnight. Mark was with us too.  That was a good year for us to bond.  You were working at Shell Point in the kitchen and she did not have a job, so she would come to our house at Shell Point and sit and talk or watch TV for hours.  It was a good family year for us. Mark started college at Edison that year. I got acquainted with my lovely new daughter-in-law.  And we had lots of family times.

You and Mark both worked in the kitchen and dining rooms at Shell Point, and you left a mark there. Years later when we visited Shell Point - and again this year - people came to our table in the Crystal Dining Room to talk to us from the kitchen and waitressing staff and asked if we were your parents. And they told us how much they liked and appreciated you there. One waitress told us of how it was Mark who had told her the Gospel and she was saved and still following the Lord.  That really meant a lot to us.  How fortunate we are to have five children and their spouses, people of integrity and witnessing lives - we are indeed blessed. 

You and Jennie came out to Burkina to visit and your siblings were there too. We travelled and had a lot of fun there in Bobo as a family.  That next furlough when we came to the States you had gone to Puerto Rico to manage that hotel. Hotel Parador La Familia.  We stayed there at the hotel and went on tourist trips with you. enjoyed the pool at the hotel, etc.  The hotel did not go well and finally you had to come back to the States, feeling like a failure as you had not succeeded with the hotel. I remember your coming to our house and staying with us a little while.  And we all worked at reassuring you that this too would pass and you came back to your normal self again. 

Mark and Katy invited you to move into their house and fixed a little basement pad for the two of you. You stayed there until you were able to get a good management job and rent a nice apartment. You also took Daniel in to live with you there for a while! Dad and I were so happy to have both of you sons and wives and a new little Alex plus Daniel all living just about an hour from us.  You all, after all, were why we had moved to Georgia in the first place!  We had lots of fun family times.

You bought the house in Buford and when Mark built his place in Flowery Branch, you were fifteen minutes from each other. And we lived an hour north. Life was good.  And then Jennie began to be sick a lot.  She saw doctors and even had an exray and nothing could be found. (You found out later the exray had been misread by the doctor!)  But you and Jennie decided to paint our house.  Ours was a sixties house in pale colors and you wanted to bring us up to date. It would have cost us more than we could afford to hire someone, and so you and Jennie came and papered and painted. What a gift to us. Jennie would come up and work on the painting when you were on a business trip and spend the night. But we could tell she was not well.

And then the dreaded verdict came, Jennie had cancer.  You did everything possible, and our hopes would go up, only to come crashing down again.  You had to travel and so we spent a lot of time with Jennie at your house. She would go up and down. Sometimes she could not get out of bed, other times she would rest a lot but come downstairs every day.  We sat with you in two different hospitals for two different operations. We waited for good news but it did not often come. When you were gone on business, we would go down and stay with Jennie.  Sometimes when she was in great pain, she would lie on the couch in your bedroom, resting in my arms and say, "Sing to me, Mom".  Or "Mom, tell me about when John was a little boy". So choking through my tears I would try to tell stories and sing old hymns to her. One day she decided she needed to go to the store for new pajamas and bras and wanted me to go with her. She drove like her old self, shopped for her clothes and seemed her normal self. But then it would be back to bed, exhausted. We talked for hours.  When she could not come downstairs, I would fix her light meals and take them up to her, trying
 to tempt her. She loved strawberries and whipped cream and Dad went to the store to keep us supplied with whatever she craved.  I learned a lot of new TV watching with Jennie - Dancing with the Stars, fixing up old houses, old movies - she just needed someone there with her.

Those were rough days for us - and much rougher for you - to see your sweet, funny wife wasting away.  Those last days of Jennie's life her whole family came, including her doctor cousin (who stayed with her through to her passing on to heaven).  How my heart ached for her parents, as well as ached for ourselves.  The praise team from the church came to sing for Jennie and she loved that. We were a huge gang with all Jennie's family from Puerto plus her doctor cousin,  our family and also Prosper Sanou from Burkina. We knew the end was near one evening and Mark stayed there at the house. We were wakened by the phone at one thirty in the morning at Mark's where we were sleeping. Jennie had gone to join the hosts of heaven and join in the singing of the heavenly choir with her lovely voice.   It was two am and we were a crowd of family all sitting around the living room at your place. The lovely lady from Hospice came in and the men came  to take care of formalities. They rolled out her body, which was so sad, but her spirit was alive and living in a place where there is no sorrow or tears, jusy joy and peace and being with Jesus. I cry as I write this, but I am assured that she is in a better place.

Was there ever a more well planned or beautiful funeral service. Many people were there - relatives, your partners in business, all our family, Prosper from Burkina, retired missionaries from Toccoa.  It was a beautiful ceremony, Mark and Katy's little ones sat through it all also. (What were they thinking, I wondered?)  The service ended with Jennie's voice singing a lovely song, by way of a tape she had given me years ago. I always loved heer voice. Mark had prepared a beautiful feast at his home and there were about seventy people invited - just family and close friends.  Before we went there the ladies of the Lilburn church had also prepared a finger foods buffet and this gave opportunities for greetings.

John, you lived in that big house by yourself and you continued your travelling with your Business after Jennie was gone. Mark and Katy were such a blessing to you then and the kids loved having Uncle John come to their house so often. Dad and I tried to get down to your place as often as we could. I was just coming out of my brain surgery problems. One day we were there at your house and sitting out back talking with you when a phone call came for you - nothing unusual - but you talked for a long time. And finally came back and told us about how you and Sheryl had started talking to each other on the phone. You had known each other in College and now you had both lost your spouses.   God had this beautiful gift all pre-planned for both of you in the sorrow of losing your spouses. And you even got a lovely sweet daughter in the bargain. 

You were officially married earlier in the year but our family all came to Westerville in June (?) to celebrate this new marriage.  That little chapel was so pretty and the ceremony beautiful. The grandchildren and Carey and Dad all participated. That evening we had that  beautifully served reception meal in a lovely restaurant, as we all rejoiced in God's goodness to you both! 

Christmas was fun too with Phenicies and us staying in your gorgeous new home to celebrate with you and your new family.  We look forward to lots more times together as a family, one of those visits right around the corner, this Easter!   We are proud of you, our first son, and a lifelong delight to us!